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daftbird's Journal
Back to daftbird's Journal
2006-08-27 12:53:39
the first cut is the deepest
daftbird
Here is my blog entry from friday. (I'm actually finding it easier to copy from there to here instead of vice versa, because when I do so all the spacing stays in - but if I copy from here to there I have to the go through and put all the spaces back in . That was useless information, was it not?)

Friday, August 25, 2006
the first cut is the deepest

Yesterday was a momentous day here. Is that even how you spell momentous? Can't remember just at the minute.

It was poodle clipping day. Miniature poodle, actually. Somebody thought that they were being kind in giving me the poodle, but all it was was that their husband wouldn't let them keep it so I gave him (the dog) a home. In my naivety regarding all things poodle I had no idea at the speed with which the hair on the (frigging) thing would grow. Probably had it around 4 years now.

This is no pampered indoor poncey- fairy dog. He is wild, roaming the backyard with a labrador of monstrous proportions. He was overdue for the haircut for due to all his roaming in the wilds of the backyard he was.....well, there's no there's no other word for it - he was just filthy. He no longer looked like anything from the Animal Kingdom. Rather a Thing. A perambulating jungle. Dags hanging off him, covered with grass and dirt - but a happy dog regardless. Can't keep referring to him as dog - for the sake of anonymity and to protect the innocent I shall refer to him as ..."Keith". Hehe. Imagine if you really called your dog Keith, so unsuitable.

And just want to put here - I said that he wasn't some inside poncey dog. People who have dogs inside can kid themselves that their house is clean, but they're dreaming.

So to get to the point it was poodle haircut day yesterday. Because it's winter and there might still be a few chilly nights you can't go too short so I had to do it myself with scissors. Besides that I'm too tight to pay someone $50.00 to do it when it could be spent on better things, such as bulk packs of toot roll or something .

I have this ongoing problem with "Keith" when his hair gets too long and that is that I can't find his balls and other equipment and spend the whole time stressed out because I think I'm going to accidentally cut his little balls off. It is a dilemma, as you can well imagine.

Another thing is that he resists all attempts at conversation:

"Keith" - how on earth do you manage to get so dirty?

"Keith" - where does all this hair come from? It's coming out the bottom of your feet! It's growing out your ears!

"Keith"!! Stay still!! Let me do under your chin - you look like Grizzly Adams!

"Keith" has obviously spent too long in the company of a labrador to realise that it's considered impolite not to speak to the hairdresser.

Thank goodness in the end I was able to locate his equipment and he survived his trimming, ready once again to venture into the yard. To eat grass and regurgitate it. To run around and then SKIP with one leg in the air in his distinctly "Keithy" way.

I always end up covered in little bits of black hair and with a massive blister at the base of my left thumb because I'm left handed and scissors are a killer. And yes, tried those left handed scissors once and can't use them. And have destoyed 2 pairs of clippers on "Keith". But ah -what a relief when it's over! Can be content in the knowledge that it'll be a whole couple of weeks before it has to be done all over again.

"Keith" - you're a curse.

Mood - bit tired
Music - some of us - starsailor
Edited - Never
2 Comments


Comments
Keith?  Not Kenneth?  Mum had a cocker spaniel.... dumbness with long hair.
Posted by:jodievdw

jodievdw  

date: 28/08/2006 14:38 GMT
"Kenneth" is actually the alias for bondgirl's dog.haha. "Dumbness with long hair" - could that not be applied to a well known tarty blonde with the initials P.H.?? That wasn't a nice thing to say. I'm SICK of being nice today! haha.
Posted by:daftbird

daftbird  

date: 28/08/2006 15:50 GMT
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