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41 I Wish I Could Get High
I Wish I Could Get High - Print Email PDF 
Posted by bretta 12/10/2009


» I Wish I Could Get ...

(from C&G 167 - October 2009)
Hi there pop pickers and welcome to another Goodies Music Review.
When we last left our intrepid musos Emperor Caligula (aka Brett Allender) and Peaches Stiletto (aka Linda Kay), they were both in fully-blown, white knuckle-inducing, sheer unadulterated panic mode … so what's new about that, you may well ask! We've been trying to get a few words of sense out of them (still no luck after 40 music reviews thus far!) but all that we can decipher to date is "Tony … Parsons … Mary … Osmond … Oliver … Blackburn … Rolf … Reed … Nicholas ... Whitehouse … Donny … Harris." Guess those dozen words in a different order would frighten the clappers out of any self-respecting Goodies fan, come to think of it! However help is at hand as we've found a most effective way to calm down our jittery jukebox jockeys (without resorting to a Max … Doonican or Val … Bygraves record either for that matter!) so we can now tune in and drop out to our dazed DJs and their music review of "I WISH I COULD GET HIGH" by The Goodies.
"I Wish I Could Get High" can be only heard on the 70s album "Nothing To Do With Us"
Lyrics: sung by Bill
I like to rock and roll, the music's in my soul
I love to join the boys in the band
I can rip off licks like Jimi Hendrix
And I can blow 'em all off the stands
But there ain't no way, no matter how I play
They let me be what I want to be
'Coz when they pass that stuff, I huff and puff
But it don't do nothin' for me
I wish, I wish, I wish, I could get high, high, high
I can't do it (ohhh!) although I try, try, try
No matter what I roll, I still can't lose control
Oh why, oh why, can't I get high?
I snort and sniff every grain and whiff
Of every kind of stuff that you know
I smoke marijuana and old bananas
Mixed up with some brew
I can chew it, I can chew it, but no matter how I do it
I can't get out of my skull
It isn't fair, I'm still aware
Lord I feel so dull
I wish, I wish, I wish, I could get high, high, high
I can't do it (ohhh!) although I try, try, try
No matter what I've used, I just don't get confused
Oh why, oh why, can't I get high?
[Instrumental break with sizzling electric guitar. Bill (marvelling at the sound): "Wow man, hey, to play like that, you gotta be out of your head!" Graeme: "No no no, I just practice a lot actually!"]
I'm so despised, I've been ostracised, I've even advertised in Time Out
Is there anyone who can turn me on, show me what it's all about
Well a guy came to me, said he'd guarantee, he could funk me up in a week
Well he did his best, but now I'm all depressed, 'coz he made me feel some kinda freak!
I wish, I wish, I wish, I could get high, high, high
I can't do it (ohhh!) although I try, try, try
Why can't I take that trip, so folks will say I'm hip?
Oh why, oh why, can't I get high, high, high …
I wish, I wish, I wish, I could get high, high, high
I can't do it (ohhh!) although I try, try, try
I tried sniffing coke … but the bubbles get up my nose!
Oh why, oh why, can't I get high
Hey man, don't give me none of that sh*t. Gimme some of that sh*t!
(Peaches Stiletto):
While some might mistakenly think this song is about altitude envy, it's actually all about hallucinogenic envy. What happens to a poor marijuana-be rock n' roller who can't join his band mates in a little doobie action? He's on a whole different level of consciousness, which makes joint negotiations a bit difficult. Networking is everything in the speedy world of music, and without those connections to hookah you up, your time is wasted. This guy doesn't want to blow it, but when he does blow it, nothing happens! It's snort a pleasant thing to feel so left out. He's has no choice . . . turn on, tune in or drop out of the band! What's a straight-head to do? But he's no dope. He's going to bong out every possibility and smoke out every option until he's stoked or croaked. Weed love to see him succeed before he his career totally goes to pot. Every career has its uppers and downers, but this poor guy really needs to hash out this situation or his career will be left in the angel dust. And that's no coke.
(Emperor Caligula):
Even though Bill has proven himself to be an expert at hitting the high notes in Goodies songs such as "Nappy Love", it's his inability to hit a different kind of high when with his band roadies that provides the frustration that this song smacks of. Now Bill's no dope when it comes to writing great comedy songs, so when he starts taking pot shots at the rock 'n roll drug culture of his era, we can be sure he's right up to speed on the subject. Although exhorting the Goodies to "take a trip to paradise" in the show's theme song, Bill probably figures that the only way for him to hit the ultimate high would have been to find himself a new band hooch could show him the light … and the green or purple haze that rises up from it. A band such as Peter, Paul and Mary-Juana who sang of "Puff The Magic Draggin'" perhaps … or in later years a joint venture with the Fine Young Cannabis singing "She Drives Me Wacky (Baccy)" (I trust that their other hit wasn't called "Goodies Thing" by any chance?!) Now well may you snort and sniff, but Bill actually had the material for the ultimate high clasped right in his grubby little mitts in any number of early Goodies episodes, perhaps without ever fully realising its potential. The lurid psychedelic visions, the scantily clad women, the Top Of The Pops fantasies … Lemon Sherbet Delusions … now just think about those initials for a second, then take a little good advice from Bill and "suck it and see!". Hey, it's whatever turns you on … and the thunderous guitar rhythm and cheeky lyrics of this seldom-heard song are a pretty cool buzz, man!
Using the Black Pudding Rating System:
IIII Officially Amazing (Peaches Stiletto)
IIIII Superstar (Emperor Caligula)
IIIII - Superstar.
IIII - Officially Amazing.
III   - Goody Goody Yum Yum.
II    - Fair-y Punkmother.
I     - Tripe on t' Pikelets.

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