GOODIES COR COMICS SYNOPSIS #33
(by Linda Kay)
(from C&G 106 – September 2004)
18th August, 1973 No. 56
Another classic comedy situation this month takes the Goodies from Cortown all the way to the South Seas when a vacation takes a bizarre turn and, a la The Lost Tribe, two of the Goodies find themselves cooking in a very politically incorrect native's pot (only Roy Kinnear does not put in a guest appearance this time).
Header: KEEP A "SHARK" LOOKOUT FOR FUN THE GOODIES ARE IN THE SOUTH SEAS!
The Goodies are outside their office, preparing to go on vacation. Tim and Graeme are dressed in light beach wear, t-shirts and shorts, while Bill is sporting a hat (and looking very put out because all of the luggage is strapped to his back). Graeme is locking the office door as Tim and Bill wait in their respective places on the trandem.
TIM: Good idea of yours for us to go to the seaside for a rest, Graeme! We'll find a nice quiet spot.
GRAEME: Leave the locking up to me - I've seen to everything else!
The Goodies arrive at the very littered beach just as rain begins to fall. Bill gets off the trandem and approaches the water where he spots a bottle floating just offshore.
GRAEME: *Bah!* No wonder this place is quiet - it's *raining!* Still, we'll be left in peace for a change!
BILL: Don't be too sure! Look - that bottle's got a message in it ... !
The Goodies inspect the message in the bottle (oblivious to the man struggling with an overturned sailboat in the distance). Bill is reading the message, but has his thumb over one pivotal letter.
MESSAGE: To the Goodies, England. Marooned in South Sea (Bill's thumb). HELP!
BILL: Coo, it's from a bloke marooned in Southsea!
GRAEME: You can't be marooned in Southsea! - Let me look .. !
Graeme looks at the message, then points out Bill's mistake as Tim gets busy inflating one of the tires from the trandem so that it's the size of a large raft.
GRAEME: Clot! It says the "South Seas"! That's thousands of miles away!
TIM: Never mind! Remember The Goodies' motto - We do anything anytime!
The Goodies find themselves at sea on the makeshift tire raft, heading toward the South Seas (a small pointer flag stuck into the cork of a floating bottle points out the way . . . "This Way for the Marooned Mariner." Tim studies a map as Graeme looks through a spyglass and Bill paddles with a tennis racket.
TIM: Looks like we're on the right track, lads!
BILL: At least it'll be sunny in the South Seas .. !
AND SO ...
The Goodies find themselves surrounded by tiny islands (one with a volcano, another with a huge skyscraper and a sign reading Private). Sharks are surrounding their raft.
GRAEME: *Yikes!* There must be hundreds of islands! It'll be like looking for a *needle* in a haystack!
TIM: Well, in that case .. !
Tim, who had been studying the map, uses a pin to pick out an island. Of course the pin goes through the map and punctures the tire raft.
TIM: .. I'll pick one out with a *pin!*
GRAEME: Oh, no! What've you done .. ?
The tire raft goes flying, propelled by the air coming out of the pinhole, taking Tim and Graeme with it. Bill is left floundering with the sharks (one of whom chomps away on Graeme's spyglass).
BILL: HELP! GOODIE OVERBOARD!
TIM & GRAEME: YEOW!
Tim and Graeme fly all the way to one of the islands and land with a splash in the giant kettle of a group of natives. In the pot already is the lost mariner who had sent the message in the bottle.
LOST MARINER: Well done, lads - you've found me!
TIM: Glad to meet you! Er ... seems we've *dropped in* for lunch!
MEANWHILE, BEHIND A BREADFRUIT TREE .. !
Bill has somehow made it to the island and is watching as the natives prepare to cook the others. He's not aware of the native spear which is aimed squarely at his posterior.
BILL: *Wow!* Those three are in a real *stew!* I'd better do something, *sharpish!*
A native sticks Bill in the bottom with his spear, causing him to jump out into the open in pain.
BILL: YEOUCH! I didn't mean that!
TIM: *Gasp!* It's Bill - making an exhibition of himself as usual!
Bill bounces all around the area in pain as the others watch from the pot.
BILL: WAAH! OOO! YEEOWL .. !
TIM: Bill, stop playing around! We've got to escape!
NATIVE COOK: Wow! Him do heap powerful *rain dance!*
Bill continues to bounce, breaking the native cook's spoon, as rain begins to fall.
TIM: I thought you wanted to get away from the rain, Bill! Looks like you brought it here with you!
The natives take off running in all directions as the rain comes down harder. The others are confused but Bill and Graeme see the reason for their hasty departure ... the nearby river is
starting to flood its banks!
NATIVE: *AEEE!* Rain! Flee, brothers!
TIM: What are they so afraid of? A drop of rain's nothing to worry about!
GRAEME: No, but that river's *overflowing*! Quick! Grab a couple of spears!
LOST MARINER: *Aar* ... how will spears help us now? That lad be "Pot-ty" if you ask me!
Bill gets into the pot and the Goodies use the spears as paddles as the river overflows and carries them to safety.
TIM: *Yippee!* Thanks to Bill's rain dance we've got away!
GRAEME: Head for home, lads!
DAYS LATER ...
The Goodies in the pot arrive at the same beach from which they'd left (their trandem is getting a parking ticket as they float ashore).
LOST MARINER: Land ahoy! I don't know (how) to thank 'ee, young sirs!
TIM: Just another job to us, sir! I'll put the spare tyre on the bike and we'll give you a lift home!
The Goodies ride their trandem back to their offices with the mariner on Bill's shoulders. As they round the bend to their offices, everyone looks happy except Tim, who has spotted something.
GRAEME: Ho, ho! When it comes to dealing with messages in *bottles* we're the *tops*!
TIM: ARRGH! That's what you think! LOOK .. !
The trandem, Goodies, mariner and all, crash into a huge pile of milk bottles left outside their office door; broken bottles and milk fly everywhere.
TIM: ... You forgot to leave a note for the milkman!
Sign-Off Line: Our T.V. Chuckle Champs Return in Next Week's Issue!
Additional material from this issue:
The Goodies were one of the answers on the puzzle page in a Scrambled Letter puzzle in which readers were instructed to shade in odd numbered squares to spell out the names of five Cor!! features.
RATING (using the BLACK PUDDING RATING SYSTEM):
IIII - Officially amazing.
The plot of this comic is fairly straightforward and simple but there are tons of tiny jokes in the background that bring this comic back to the rich, detailed and fun strips more typical of the Cor!! Goodies outings. In the first panel there is a little boy and a dog standing to the side and watching as the Goodies leave. When they arrive at the vacation beach it is littered with broken bottles, tin cans, apple cores and even barbed wire. We can already see the floundering sailboat and its hapless occupant in the background and the man's predicament gets progressively worse in the next two panels. A seagull is standing on the back of the trandem watching Tim overinflate the bike's tire.
The detail of the many islands which the Goodies find themselves surrounded by is charming. Graeme loses his glasses as he turns his head from the open and menacing jaws of a shark when Tim sticks the pin in the tire (this explains how the shark got Graeme's spyglass). Even though Bill is hanging onto the raft the tightest at this point he's the one who gets left behind when it goes flying.
When Tim and Graeme land in the natives' pot the fire for the pot is being fuelled by a line which leads to a little pump in the corner that reads "South Sea Gas." The native cook is holding a packet of salt and a sign attached to one of the huts reads "Tonite Grand Barbecue." The natives are standard politically incorrect big-lipped black natives which were typical in cartoons for an amazingly long period of time. The assortment of natives includes a beautiful Hawaiian-looking native girl and a little child. Some are wearing top hats and spats.
The breadfruit tree Bill is hiding behind bears different kinds of bread such as thin sliced, whole meal and Slimmo (some in packages). One loaf of bread falls toward the native's head after he spears Bill's behind. In the panel in which Bill is bouncing around one native is holding a golf club. When Bill breaks the native cook's spoon he also bounces off the end of another native's spear, leaving it bent and crooked. The shield this native is holding bears the words "Empire Made."
As the Goodies speed away from the island several natives can be seen in the background waving their spears at them. When they arrive back in England they look drawn, dry and shaggy, and a seagull is sitting upon Tim's head. As they approach their office (which is marked on a wall with an arrow and the words "To the Goodies Pad") a cat is laying on the ground in some yet unknown liquid and looking giddy. It's revealed the cat is lying in milk when the Goodies crash into the bottles and the cat remains lethargically in the puddle of milk, slurping away happily.
This comic marks a vast improvement over some of the comics immediately preceding it and really brings the strip back on track. The puns actually work in this episode, the dialogue is concise and not wasted, and the artwork is rich, animated and chock full of bonus gags. Definitely one of the better of the series!